Making friends in Madrid when your Spanish is bad

The advice you get is "join a language exchange". It is correct and it is incomplete, because an intercambio gives you an hour of conversation with someone you may never see again.

What actually works is repetition. The same thing, the same time, every week, with the same people.

Things that repeat

• A group with a fixed slot. A Thursday board-game night, a Sunday running group, a weekly intercambio in the same bar. Turn up four times and you know people. Turn up once and you don't.
• A class. Anything: Spanish, pottery, climbing, dance. The class is the excuse; the coffee afterwards is the point.
• A sport with fixed teams. Padel is the obvious one here — everybody plays, and every group is permanently one player short.
• Your barrio. Use the same bar. The bartender learning your order is the first thread.

What to accept about the timings

Dinner at 21:30 is not late here, it is dinner. Plans are made the same day and confirmed an hour beforehand. A "quedamos sobre las nueve" means somewhere between 21:00 and 21:40. None of this is rudeness and none of it is aimed at you.

On the language

Your Spanish gets better through boredom, not classes: waiting rooms, small talk, the same conversation about the weather forty times. Take the small talk.

And find one person who will correct you. Most people are too polite. One friend who says "se dice así" is worth three months of Duolingo.

The uncomfortable bit

The first three months are lonely for nearly everyone, including the people who look like they have it sorted. It is not a sign you chose wrong. Show up to the same thing four times.